Forgetting

I try to stop thinking about everything.
I try to stop caring
I try to let it all go.
I try to focus on happiness.

Everything still runs through my brain.
I still care.
I still remember.
Happiness eludes me.
I'm still in pain.

I need to forget.
I need something to make me forget.
I forgive but I can't forget.

I ask for understanding.
I get ignorance and pain.
I ask for forgiveness
I get nothing.

All I can do is pray.
With His mercy
I will forget
I receive forgiveness
I will clarify my thoughts
I will be happy, eventually.
But I won't stop caring - though I want to so badly!